Armed with a stone slab of the ten commandments and a bitter hatred of all things sensical, Patrick “PJ” Mulcahy escaped from Beaverton again today to file an official complaint with the Oregon Elections Division and the Oregon Attorney General. As you might remember, dear old PJ recently rented the rumpus (Pettygrove) room at Portland City Hall to spew anti-gay messages with an authentic looking, but ultimately fake, stone replica of the ten commandments at his side, proving once and for all that lunacy and Alzheimer’s are an embarrassing combination.
Anyway, Mulcahy accuses Mayor Adams…. yes, Mayor Adams of PORTLAND (one of thousands of cities that PJ does not reside in, as he’s from Beavteron) of winning the election through fraudulent means and that he violated the constitution and a few of the aforementioned commandments by not necking with Mr. Mulcahy first.
A spokesperson for the states Elections Division, whose name we couldn’t make out because she was laughing hysterically after Patrick Mulcahy left to go play bingo, said that they have no idea under which statute this complaint would fall under, further confirming what we’ve suspected all along….
It’s not the mid 20th century anymore and you can’t oust a political figure for kissing a man and not consulting you first. Now take your meds PJ, Jeopardy is going to be on soon and we’re cooking you and the other convalescent home residents some delicious Hot Pockets®!!
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Is the endless stream of insults really of intellectual benefit to anyone? My own views aside, Patrick Mulcahy seems perfectly fit mentally.
Some believe that the mayor of portland has influence on suburban cities. I see your point but there might just be something to it, or maybe my wife and her voice of reason is starting to get to me
Benji: When are you going to figure out that I’ve never claimed to be “of intellectual benefit” to anyone?
JoeV: I don’t disagree, I’m sure there is something to it. I just don’t like the idea of some old dude from Beaverton having a say in who’s mayor and who isn’t. That’d be like allowing the Canadians the opportunity to vote for a US president. Let’s face it, the president of the US has influence on Canada…
Good point.